words
GROW APART
Missed out on poker faces, gave it all away at the eyes
You broke the window that I leave unlocked for you in the night
The fall of your footsteps has imprinted itself in my mind
Forgive forget me, don’t regret me in this life—
Time will do its thing
I will love you from afar
You and I will heal, independently
We will grow, apart
Grow, apart
My occupation was your attention and how to win it
Your expectations were a prison and I put me in it
Foundation shaky, we were based off of two truths and a lie
It wasn’t what we had, just something we ran out of—
Time will do its thing
I will love you from afar
You and I will heal, independently
We will grow, apart
A part of you resides inside my head
That no one else will ever know
It’s hard to accept that’s in the past now
And I have to let it go
A part of me will be with you
When you hear someone singing from their heart
You don’t know the me that knows the real me
Only the one that’s too scared to start
Time will do its thing (Time)
I will love you from afar (Love)
You and I will heal, independently (Heal)
We will grow, apart (Grow, apart)
FREAK
Golden little island
Independent girl
Couldn’t float right
Good at stuff, good at heart
Goodness gracious, getting pretty far!
Learn the rules
Dress the part
Gunning for a breakthrough
What’s the cost of compromise
And broadcasting fake news?
I’ll tell you the truth
I’m never going back
I lied, I might never grow it back
Collecting all sorts of beastly creatures
As a throughway to a form
I always pictured that I would have
A mane to keep me warm
Hack the code and
Run the days through til it’s been weeks
Gingerly step around the zoo
Cause captivity’s where I keep my freak
LET HIM OUT!
I’m never going back
I lied, I might never grow it back
TABLE OF ANGELS
My table of angels grows down a hall
In a garden that I said looks better overgrown
My bottle of demons flows through the strings
Of a puppet that I let put on a show
Oh, we’re dancing now, dancing dancing now
And oh, she’ll show me how, show me show me how
And oh, when trumpets blow I’m home again
My school is the moment I see the setting sun
On the empire that I built on the back of one
My house is a wooden pallet on the lawn
But they came and tore it down before the dawn
Oh, we’re dancing now, dancing dancing now
And oh, she’ll show me how, show me show me how
And oh, when trumpets blow I’m home again
My table of angels grows
My table of angels grows
The EP
Daydreams
Please. I’d like to go my speed. A little slower. If you try to escalate, I will go lower. Keep your spark away from me, and I will hide the fuse. I hate that you find me amusing, and I find you a muse. I wish you would get out of my daydreams. It seems that my heart has taken to painting your face into all of my daydreams, while I have to make do with the distance I create from you. There’s a truth and a lie in each daydream. Scenes that all start impossibly because you’d hold me only in a daydream. For now I will make do with what I know to be true. I feel for you, at least like companions do. And now’s not the time, and it’s fine, and I won’t wait in line, I’ll just daydream. I know what to do, but can I do it too? Put up a screen you can’t see through, I expect nothing from you. I’m just saying. Each time when you visit my daydreams, I don’t fall apart, but make up a case as to why I permit you in my daydreams, when you could make do visiting someone new. Go visit someone new.
Ceasefire
I am an inconvenient truth. Honey drips from my hands. But it looks like venom to you, don’t it now? An olive branch in my right hand, and a white flag in my left. You won’t let me say it with my mouth, so I’ll sing it with my chest. Ceasefire. Ceasefire. Neither you nor I can see behind the trenches we’re so deep down inside. Every time you lie I die a little, so I’m calling for a ceasefire. Men are from mars. Your heart fights a war with your head. Dammed up the reservoir. Stuffed your ears with cotton instead. A white flag in my left hand, and an olive branch in my right.
Sing to the Moon
At night I sing to the moon, whispering low about you. If you’re looking up, and the music’s low enough, you can probably hear it too. Last night I sang to the moon, wailing on about lovers past. With their ears to the ground, maybe my voice will carry down and my words will be the last. I don’t know what it means to mend, and I know I won’t hear from you soon. But ‘til then, I’ll tie up my ends, and hang them on the moon. Each night I sing to the moon, stone cold sober and stoned. And I try to catch the sunset on the causeway, ‘cause something has to burn the bridge I won’t.
Deep End
Staring out the window on the highway. I know you grew up in the place where the green signs say I am. And I swore I saw your backyard in the distance. Your dad made you rake the leaves, you said I wouldn’t understand. I don’t watch horror films except when you put on Donny Darko. And you take the empathetic route far less than I do. I was tougher than I looked or at least I thought so. We laughed at monsters in your bed the night you told me that I loved you. And I’m off the deep end, into your deep I went. I’ll tread this water as long as I can stand. It’s not wallowing if it helps me figure out who I am. You called me in, dragged me down, and held me closer so I couldn’t climb out. You called me in, dragged me down, and held me closer so I couldn’t climb out. You called me in, dragged me down, and held me closer so I couldn’t climb out. You called me in, dragged me down, and held me closer so I couldn’t climb out of the deep end. Into your deep I went. I’ll tread this water as long as I can stand. It’s not wallowing if it helps me figure out who I am. It’s not wallowing if it helps me figure out what I want. It’s not wallowing if it helps me to understand him. It’s not wallowing if it helps me to protect my heart from the deep end.